So you want to be grown huh? I can remember my mom and dad asking me that question when I did something to grown for my age. We all remember being told no or being put on punishment. I would stomp off to my room “I can’t wait till I get grown so I can do what I want to do”. News flash, my adult life has been more about doing stuff I HAVE to do than it has been doing what I want to do! They failed to inform me of this when I got here! That’s what I said to myself around about twenty-five. Granted I have free WILL, I can do what I want but given the reality, there are consequences aka barriers and rules to follow. ADULTING is paying bills, keeping the car registered going to work, paying rent, going to school, paying for school etc etc etc. Its that one moment it all snaps together and you realize…bihhhh IM GROWN ….the real kind! Somewhere along the line, you break out of the boxes that bound you and find out who you REALLY are. That alone is enough to want to ball in the fetal position rock back and forth singing, ” I don’t wanna grow up I’m a toy r us kid” Ok so it won’t be that bad but reality will set in and hold no cards back.
As a child, your parents in many ways shape you into the person you are to be. They are the first awareness of an authoritative figure in your life. They are at that point your God. This is before you are ever given a God figure idea to worship. You are too young at that point to grasp the idea of who or what “God” is. They feed you, clothe you, nurture you, discipline you, love you care for you. They are the beginning and the ending to all that you do and all that you know. Eventually, you are introduced or become aware of an even greater controlling or authoritative presence. Your parents introduce this figure as God. You may have asked; “well who is “God”, “where does he live”, where is he?” You are told stories and given imagery to help you grasp the idea of who and what God is. This is your foundation. You begin to pattern your thinking and actions towards appeasing this figure and live up to your parent’s expectations. You develop your own set of morals and values based on the environment you grew up in. The images and sounds that are circulated. The things you experience while you are in that environment. You are being programmed with information that starts to shape the way you think and react to the world. In transition into adulthood, you begin to have your own experiences. You start to see the world more with your own eyes. Sometimes those things that were programmed in you while you were growing up either make sense or you question the validity of them. You may adhere to the warnings of your prime authoritative figures or you may rebel and try to experience something on your own. Nevertheless, you start to live your life based on your current knowledge and you navigate through those various situations the best you know how.
Once in a while, you will become aware of something that you were taught that no longer serve you. You may experience certain things that you were urged to stay away from and find out they aren’t so bad, for you. You may indulge in something that you are immediately aware are not things you feel comfortable doing. You have been shaped by various life experiences of your authoritative figures and you have to come to your own conclusion about what is and what is not of you. Shedding programs that had you bound for so long is not easy. And you may not shed all of those programs. Some of those programs are very comfortable for you and you have accepted the peace or turmoil that comes with it. When it boils down to it you have to define you! You have to think of yourself as a brand and what you present is what your brand offers. Never be afraid to be who you are though. I rather you be real than to be real fake. Mask Off